(via poeticheartache)

(via poeticheartache)
Seth: I had sex with a girl! Summer, to be more specific.
Ryan: How was it?
Seth: I had sex.
(whispering)
Ryan: That bad?
Seth: No, not that bad it was just kind of weird.
Ryan: Weird?
Seth: Yeah, but not kinky weird. More like, awkward. But hey, you know what? It was my first time and she’s a more experienced woman, that’s to be expected. And I did make some faces in the middle that I wish that I could take back, but I can’t. And there’s also sort of a whiny noise that came out towards the end, that wasn’t my finest hour. And I sucked so bad. I was like a fish flopping around on dry land. Ryan, I was Nemo and I just wanted to go home.The O.C. 1.19 - “The Heartbreak”(via ephee : justalittlebossy)
lol
Puerto Ricans man, y’all confusing, I can tell one of us Dominicans from a mile away, but some of y’all be lookin like Adolf Hitlers chosen people or some shit lmao, I’m sorry but it’s true, you got muhfuckas with light brown hair, fair ass skin and green eyes yelling “Boricuaaaaa”, shit be fucking me up cause I look around like, huh, it’s opposite day?
HOW
to make love to something innocent
without leaving my fingerprints out
NOW.
L-O-V-E is just a word I never learned to pronounce.
HOW
do I say I’m sorry cause the word is never gonna come out?
*slick 3oh!3 realll slick sticking katy perry in the song…its real catchy-even catchier than the original now.
I can somewhat relate to the lyrics…guess that makes me a bit of a bastard sometimes. oops!
Shakira - Lo Hecho Está Hecho (official video)
The dancing in this video is insane. Shakira really makes me want to belly dance. I’m determined to learn during winter break.
looks like fun
You’re An American Apparel Model
Okay, so we’ve been dating for a while now and you have yet to put pants on. I’m sorry, but I can’t introduce you to my family while you’re wearing a see through mesh bodysuit. I just don’t think my grandmother would appreciate an up close view of your vagina. Just a hunch I had. Ugh. This is really hard for me to say, but- I’m sorry, can you cover your nipples for ONE second? This is kind of important. I don’t think this is working out, and- no, I don’t know where you can get some more coke, but that’s sort of the prob- it’s really hard for me to have this conversation with you when you’re writhing around on the floor like a sexy jellyfish. Use your bones like people do. Also, you’re always rubbing your eyes and looking bewildered like you just woke up from a nightmare. Have you been sleeping on the floor again? Oh, this is pretty troubling, but you seem to have a habit of yelling “Dov!” while we’re having sex and then bursting out laughing and THEN crying. You know that’s not my name, right? And how many “corporate retreats” does your company take you on? You’re always leaving for days on end, and you always wake up in dingy basements. Your “job” is starting to sound like you’re just being routinely kidnapped every few days. Well, I guess that’s it. I actually feel a lot better, thanks for finally listening. Babe? Sweetie? You okay? Oh shit. Oh no! Wake up! Does anyone have any cocaine? Perhaps a Polaroid camera? Some sugar free Red Bull, maybe? Get me a flash drive with Girl Talk on it, STAT! A life is hanging in the balance!
How about the whole OD-ing on scrunchie’s business? Now THAT’S a deal breaker. Im jus sayin.
(via chelabailey)
Every day of my life there is not enough eighties. People walking around with flat hair, cold ankles and not NEARLY enough feather in a firm hold. *shakes head* “this is not enough eighties”.